The Baggage of Unforgiveness

The dictionary tells me that unforgiveness is not a word. Well, I am going to use it anyway. The meaning is self-evident. It is the inability to leave behind something in one’s past. It is the need to harbor the memory of a hurt or many hurts, thinking that holding on to or not letting go of the remembrances will somehow get even with the individual who harmed or is harming us. This comes naturally as a protective mechanism. How can one move on from the wounds and the feelings that upset our entire being?

Each of us is made up of a mind, a body, and a spirit component. When one part of us is out of balance it affects all aspects of our life. When our mind and emotions are stuck in the past, our physical body and spirit are also ill at ease. They experience dis-ease. This gives our body and our immune system an opening to diseases of the body and of the mind; illness and depression.

God speaks to us in His word about wholeness. The Bible will guide us, direct us, and show us how to live. God gave us His Son, Jesus, as an example of the perfect, sinless life. We cannot attain perfection but we should try to live as God would want us to live. He will give us the balance, strength, wisdom, and power to know truth and to be able to trust and obey. His Grace is sufficient (2Corinthians 12:9). When we are weak, He is our strength.

When we are unable to forgive, it is our own body, mind, and spirit that suffer. The thoughts and feelings of anger, hurt, bitterness, and vengeance do not harm anyone else. When these emotions are deep-seeded, it is hard, almost impossible, for us humanly to forgive. But, nothing is impossible with God. Ask anything in his name and it shall be done. God can, supernaturally, do for us that which we cannot accomplish on our own.
The first step that we must take is to recognize that we are harboring unforgiveness. We must realize that we have been unable to forgive our self or someone else. We make a choice to forgive or choose to stay stuck where we presently are. When we seek to forgive, so we can move on, God will hear our plea. He will make forgiveness possible.

We have control over our own decision but we cannot change another individual or the facts of the past circumstances. Forgiveness takes away the power and control that another person has over our life. Unforgiveness affects how we react in and to other relationships and experiences in our daily lives. The act of forgiveness doesn’t justify or minimize the hurt or even excuse it; it just helps us to let go of it. We must realize that it is not about the other person, it is about our self and our choice to keep the wound or let it go. God will help us through the process of putting it behind us.

We recognize the need to forgive, we choose to forgive, we give the process to God, and we then experience freedom from the bondage of our unforgiving spirit. When we are free in Christ, we are free indeed! In that freedom, we experience the ability to receive all that God has planned for us. The Holy Spirit is now able to fill our spirit with His gifts, unhindered by the barrier of an unforgiving heart. Love, compassion, and empathy can now flow from Him through us. We can now experience healing and the gifts of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control (Galatians 5:22,23).

God wants us to be whole and He wants us to be healed. In Mark 2:5, The word says, “Seeing their faith, Jesus said to the paralyzed man, ‘My son, your sins are forgiven’ ”. Forgiveness is equated with healing. His sins were forgiven and his body was healed. In faith, he and his friends came to Jesus believing that he would be healed. His faith made him whole.

James 5:16 says “Confess your offenses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The insistent prayer of a righteous person is powerfully effective”.

God instructs us to forgive in Matthew 6:14-15. He says, “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you don’t forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”.

Ephesians 4:32 says, “And be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you”.

Proverbs 20:22 says, “Do not say, ‘I’ll pay you back for this wrong’, wait for the Lord and He will deliver you”.

I would encourage you to continue studying forgiveness by reading the many other passages of scripture which teach us about forgiveness. Look in your concordance or search the Internet for a list of Biblical passages on forgiveness. God will direct you to the ones that will speak to your heart and free you from the baggage of unforgiveness. He has promised us that when we seek we shall find.

When we choose to forgive, God will enable us to forgive and be healed.